Backhanded compliments that are really insults

You look like you’ve lost weight: Why is commenting on a reduction in weight always considered to be complimentary.

You look great for your age: Any compliment that has a qualifier like "for your age" or "for someone who didn't go to college" is the ultimate backhander.

You don’t even look pregnant: Pregnancy doesn't suddenly make it okay to comment on someone else's appearance.

You’re so pretty, how are you still single: This "compliment" suggests that we are all ultimately looking for a partner to complete ourselves.

I can’t believe you got the job, well done: Congrats on surpassing my low expectations of you.

Your new haircut looks so much better than your old one:  Your new haircut looks good, but they didn't like your old one.

You’re so beautiful, what are you: This is where we get to the racially insensitive "compliments." Someone BIPOC is likely pretty sick of hearing that they look exotic.

You look so professional with your hair like that: In the professional world, there's a chronic issue of systemic racism that labels natural Black hair as unruly and unprofessional looking.

You’re so articulate: This kind of compliment usually comes from a white person to a non-white person. 

You’re so brave and inspiring: When a differently abled person is overly applauded and admired simply for doing something average like going to work.

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